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Feelings - Alix Edwards

Updated: May 21, 2021



Sam stares through the water droplets on her window watching the train go by. It has been a long day at work, but all she can think about is if she will regret the decision she made the night before. She and Michael have been best friends since the beginning of high school, and he was the only one that made he feel welcomed after she moved there. What if it ruined their friendship? She couldn’t believe he was just now telling her that he had feelings for her. They were both about to start new jobs and enter a new chapter in life. But what if this was supposed to be in the new chapter?

Sam pulls into the parking lot of her apartment complex. The stars and moon light up the sky. It reminds her of how she and Michael would look at stars after grabbing a bite to eat at the local grill after his basketball games their senior year. As a slight smile grows across her face, she cannot help but reminisce about old feelings, his big smile, and his contagious laugh. When he would bring up his old crushes or short flings, she would feel jealous. She never wanted to tell him; she was afraid he would not feel the same about her. So, she made it her mission to wipe away every romantic thought she had about him.

Later, Sam ties her headscarf around her braids and washes her face with her organic face bar. What if they’re supposed to be together? Before going to bed, she remembers to water her dehydrated plants, and just above her aloe vera plant, her heart flutters at the picture of them at graduation. Sam makes her way to bed when she gets a text. It’s from Michael. Her heart skips a beat as she opens the message.

“Hey Sammie, I know you’re probs getting ready to go to sleep. Just letting you know I’m sorry if I made things weird last night. I didn’t know how or when to tell you, so I just did.”

She sighs and takes a break before reading more.

“Want to hit up our old spot tomorrow after work? It’s been a minute.”

She doesn’t hesitate. “Sure. We can make it a date if that’s okay with you. I have something I need to tell you.”

She has a difficult time falling asleep. Maybe things between them can work out. She has a feeling of excitement and extreme nervousness, which normally does not happen when they plan to meet up. Finally, she falls asleep.

The next day, she clocks out from work, and the butterflies instantly hit. Before heading home to get ready, she stops at a new boutique she's had her eye on for a month. She cannot believe she wants to impress someone who she would have burping contests with. It has been a while since she’s worn a dress and even longer since Michael has seen her in one. Sam wants something fitted as she is now more comfortable in her body. As she holds a long royal blue summer dress against her body, she can see someone staring at her out of the corner of her eye. Sam quickly looks to her left and sees a woman standing by the dressing room. Of course it's Michael’s ex-girlfriend, Rachel. It didn’t last long; she was pretty controlling. A slight fake grin crosses her face as Rachel waves at her. Rachel is outgoing but stuck up.

“OMG, Saaaaaammm! How are you doing? Long time, no seeeeee!”

As much as Sam tries to hide her disinterest, she pulls through with a simple, “Oh, good. What about yourself?” Sam’s voice becomes high pitched as she’s tries her best to be genuine. Rachel frowns and looks a bit confused.

“I’m doing quite well, actually. You know, it is so funny, I need a slight favor. I saw Michael at the bar last night, and he was checking me out. Tell him to call me.”

Sam’s hands and feet are cold. She could not believe he would let her down like this. She buys the dress anyway. To treat herself.

Later that night, Sam watches the new season of the Bachelorette and gets a text from Michael.

“Hey, are we still meeting up?”

Sam gets nervous and does not know how to reply. Was she overreacting? Could it still work between them?

Sam texts back, “Yes”. She pulls the dress down over her head, wiggles her way into comfort, then does her makeup as best she can.

As she walks up to the grill, she contemplates if she should bring up what happened with Rachel.

Sammie!”, Michael yells across the room. He had gotten there first. As Sam walks towards his table, all she can see is Michael’s big smile.

“You look beautiful,” Michael tells her.

“You look quite well yourself,” Sam replies.

She sits down and they both order a beer. They converse over the usual things, and then there is silence between them. Michael stares into Sam’s eyes, but she cannot help but think about earlier.

She takes a deep breath and asks him, “Did you see Rachel at the bar last night?”

Michael looks confused, “Yeah, but it wasn’t like that. I got a little tipsy and told her how I feel about you.”

Now, Sam is confused. “Well, she told me you checked her out and to call her.”

“Why would I do that?” Michael says shaking his head. “Why in the world would I jeopardize the one chance I have at being with you? It must have made her mad, and that’s why she made up that lie.”

Sam smiles, and they quickly change the topic. After eating, they go for a walk as they look at the stars.

“Exactly like in high school, huh?” Michael says staring at Sam as she looks up.

“Yep.” Sam giggles.

They walk to their old high school football field and sit in the bleachers. High school football games were the heart of the town and one of their favorite things to do. They laugh until it hurts as they remember the old moments they had. There is a long pause, and they lean in for their first kiss.

“Oh, and by the way, I feel the same way about you Michael.”


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